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Writing > Users > Sharpygreencatgirl > 2010

Writing Resources from Fifteen Minutes of Fiction


The following is a piece of writing submitted by Sharpygreencatgirl on December 13, 2010

Surprise Party

"Gather up your presents and cards." I was at my best friend, Val's house. Her mom had been trying to get us into the car for the last 45 minutes. "Mom, it does NOT take 45 minutes to get to her house!" Val said for the fifth time. We were participating in a surprise party for our old teacher. We'd had here as a teacher since we were 6 years old! Now that we were in high school we didn't see her much.
"Ugh! I can't believe she married Mr. Banks!" I was referring to our old creepy Chemistry teacher. "I know! He's such a creepy guy! His smile makes me shudder!" Val replied shuddering at the thought of him...
Eventually, we did get into the car. The whole way to Miss (what we'd always called our teacher) and Mr. Bank's house, Val's mom fretted about how late we were going to be.
We arrived at 12:50, ten minutes early. As we walked in the door Mr. Bank's greeted us with his Joker-like smile and tried to give us hugs. We kind of brushed past him, making him look like an idiot trying to hug us as we walked by. Down in the basement was were all our friends were: Alexa, Maggie, Christ and Billy. I gave them the small Christmas presents I'd bought. Christi and Alexa were especially pleased with the fake cigarettes and Maggie gobbled up her bag of chocolates before anyone could say "I want one!"
Miss was at lunch with her Mom and we Mr. Banks had us rehearse the surprise several times. "When I say, how was lunch Calisa? You guys all jump out and shout HELLO CALISA!"
"Shouldn't we shout SURPRISE?" I said.
He turned to me and frowned.
"Yeah. That's a good idea, Teagan." several people agreed.
"Well then," Mr. Banks said with a sniff "I guess we'll say SURPRISE!"
We all waited in our hiding spots. Val, Alexa and I hid in the stair way by the door. Mr. Banks had begrudgingly let us have one of the Walkie Talkies. "She's coming in on Baker. Roger that?" said one of the lookouts, through the walkie talkie. "Roger!" Alexa said. We switched to channel 3, which Mr. Banks had INSISTED on using even though it was a bit fuzzy and everyone else was using channel 4.
"She's coming down Baker. Roger?"
"Roger Matees!!!!!" Mr. Banks cried into the Walkie Talkie and everyone was ushered into there hiding spots and we rehearsed once more.
"She's coming up the sidewalk!" Mr. Banks screamed a few minutes later. "SHUUUSSSSSSSSH!!!!!" everyone said in unison.
We heard the door open and Mr. Banks gave his opening line. "SURPRISE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" we all jumped out of hallways, doors, closets and cabinets. The look on her face was priceless. After a few moments of her gasping, spluttering and sneezing most of us headed to the dessert table. Mr. Banks kissed her on the mouth!!! Oh-er!
The people who hadn't headed for food were repulsed enough by that to leave the hall way. Once people had gotten food, greeted Miss and settled down Mr. Banks proposed a toast. After we toasted he gave a speech about Miss's life and how he'd proposed to her and BLAH BLAH BLAH. Then he SANG A SONG FOR HER!!! and not only that, but he played his "snazzy gold accordian!"
It was all about how he loved her so much and would love her til the end of time and forever and ever and ever AND EVER!!! Miss was soooo embarrassed. She turned bright red and started giggling uncontrollably.
Later cake was served. I told her she was doomed because everyone, accept me, had eaten cake before her. And, of course that is VERY bad luck. We sat down together, after she ate her cake, and I told her about crew and my new school. She said she was roomies with a bunch of crew peeps in college and they were HUGE partiers. Now she's convinced I am too....
Christi and Alexa came over and she told us about her sweet 16 surprise party. "I was sooo popular as you know!" she was saying "The surprise party was at my hot boyfriends house, he was in a band called the Naked Cow Bells."
"Your life was so interesting." said Christi wistfully and took a drag on her cigarette. "Yeah, It was! I'd had about 20 boyfriends by the time i was 16..." Miss said.
"The only guy I want to be with is Koji." said Alexa taking a drag on her cigarretet. Koji was her obnoxious boyfriend...
That's when Miss noticed they were smoking. She turned bright red and started gasping and spluttering again. We were laughing so hard the three of us fell on the floor. When she heard it was me who bought them she said "Of course it was you Teagan!" And walked off to get more cake.
After chatting with other old classmates and saying a hurried goodbye to Mr. Banks, I went over to Miss and gave her a hug. "Bye Teagan." She said. "I really do miss you!"
"Uhhh...me too." I replied and went outside to where my Mom's car was waiting.
That was the first surprise party I'd ever participated in. It had been interesting.

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